A Richer Understanding: Compromises for Sanity

Brian Tramuel helms this series. He lives with his wife Michelle, their children Geneva and Brian, and their Cocker Spaniel Maestro in Charlotte, NC. They, along with his two older children from a previous marriage, Davina and Aaron, provide a constant source of inspiration. Aaron lives, works and plays in Charlotte and Davina lives, works and plays in Roanoke, VA.

A Richer UnderstandingMy wife and I were married in April of this year. Prior, we had known each other for twelve years. There are millions of statistics on why marriages fail; money and communication lead the way. On one hand I can count the number of arguments we’ve had concerning money, however we approach spending and saving very differently.

We are currently shopping for furniture, we need [not want] everything; from our bedrooms, living room, dining room and into the kitchen. Reconciling the old and worn, we decided to focus on a kitchen table first.

We [and by we I mean she] decided on a budget for the table. I wanted to approach it practically by searching online for a style and/or brand and then shop for the best value/deal in store or online. Instead we have visited every showroom in the city with no idea on what we [read: she] wants, unable to agree on any one particular style.

To date, we still do not have a kitchen table.

Physical and Fiscal Fitness - Read MoreNorth Carolina is considered the furniture capital of the world. Our next step will be a forty-five minute excursion to Hickory and High Point North Carolina where we will be able to choose from quality, handcrafted furnishings and hopefully greatly reduced prices. The concentration of manufactures’ and factories should allow for receiving professional advice and make customization more practical.

This experience is teaching me a few things, none more evident than there is no such thing as a compromise. Lol, I’m just serious, someone always gets their way however …

  • Try to budget your energy; even it has its limits.
  • For greater cost effectiveness, at times it may be better to allow people their own approach and values.

I remain.

Blogger-in-Chief here at RetirementSavvy and author of Sin City Greed, Cream City Hustle and RENDEZVOUS WITH RETIREMENT: A Guide to Getting Fiscally Fit.


  1. Very good Brian. I have a great system in my marriage my husband just agrees with me. 😁 Mainly because I dislike any shopping. He reckons if I say we need it we must really need it.

    • Your system sounds a lot like the one employed in my house. You and my wife must have studied at the same school!

  2. About a month ago, we agreed on our new kitchen layout. However, I foolishly mentioned that IKEA has kitchen sales several times a year. Since that time, my husband has changed our kitchen design every evening. It’s gotten to the point where my only response is… as long as there are drawers on the bottom.

    • ” … my only response is …as long as there are drawers on the bottom.” I love it! Clearly at this point you are working on simply trying to maintain your sanity. While the wife and I agree on most household changes/updates, I have been where you are with respect to your new kitchen layout on occasion … distilling it down to my one ‘must have’ and letting the rest go.

  3. Great article. I especially like the “I’m just serious” part! You are right on when you say there is no such thing as compromise, someone always gets their way!

    • Indeed. Great line. A little humor from Brian 🙂

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